Monday, April 30, 2012

Healthy Monday


So, I've really wanted, over the last, few months to get really focused on changing my lifestyle and getting healthier. A few months ago, I started eating better and running and working out, but exams got in the way and my lazy self kicked in so I quit. (Despite the fact that I used to feel amazing when I ran/worked out)

I'm realizing, the older and the happier I get the less my body will just magically shed off pounds. When I finished High School, I weighed 144 pounds (65 kg). I blame that on being in a boarding school, where BFF and I indulged in late night biscuits and crisps every single night! That December Kenya had the Post Election Violence and my weight dropped to 127 pounds (58kg) and I got an ulcer. S.T.R.E.S.S. Then, a year later, I was in a stressful relationship and I dropped again to 119 pounds (54kg).

Now 2 years later, I'm back to what I guess is my usual 127 pounds (58kg). I'm not really looking to lose weight, I pretty much love the way I look, but I'd like not wheezing and sweating buckets when I climb the stairs or getting dizzy when I stand up too fast. I am a couch potato and I hate to sweat, but I need to change that. I'm approaching 25, and according to most people that's when it your body mass changes and you plateau. There's also the fact that high blood pressure, heart problems and cancer runs in my family, so I really need to start taking care of myself.

I've been checking out Pinterest and most of the pins disturbed me. People are glorifying these stick thin bodies and its really easy to get down on yourself when you start comparing your body with some of those pictures. I think people should consider genetics and quality of life before you determine that a certain picture is how you want to look. For instance, yes, I'd like Taylor Swift's arms, but for me that would mean I'll never eat pizza again! So, fuggedabboudit!

Anyway, I want to be active and healthy. I want to get back my perfect, glowy skin that I lost in this french fry grease and vegetable-less life I lead, and, yes, why lie, I want to rock a two-piece bathing suit when I go swimming once this weather changes back!

So, I declare every Monday, Healthy Monday!

  1. I'll put up my motivation for the week
  2. I'll have my healthy diet pick of the week
  3. I'll set out my work-out goals 
  4. I'll confess whether or not I failed or succeeded that week

We'll see how that goes.

This week:

Healthy Diet 

  • Cut out extra sugar and drink more water
  • Skim milk (50%) instead of whole milk

Work-Out Goals

I started today so, PASS!

The TV, The Anger and The Aftermath

I found myself in such a weird space last 2 days. The smallest things just ticked me off, and I spiraled into all this negativity I thought I was over. For instance, we’ve been getting tons of blackouts recently, and yesterday (Sunday) I was trying to like have some quiet time, and I was worshipping along with Hillsong United, and just when I started you know pressing in, the lights go off! The “Christian” thing after a time of worship is to be all Zen, but I was so mad! Like, I was pressing in, and the sound goes off, so I juts unplugged my speakers and tried to go on, but the moment (in my head) was gone. So I tried to see it like a sign from God and tried to do something positive, so I pulled out my journal and tried writing a sermon based on the prodigal son. That quickly flopped and I got even madder.

Then I got even madder because I was missing the wedding show and this was a Will & Kate inspired wedding I was dying to see. I was really, really mad! Well, the lights did end up coming back and I did watch the Ksh. 20 Million wedding, and saw the guy in the Ksh. 3 million Prince Will replica uniform, and my mood did pick up a little.

After a while though, I realized I might have some anger that I haven’t dealt with yet. This is that cleansing year where I deal with all these little, ok big, issues I have, and that’s one of them. If I have some deep seated anger that pops up randomly, shouldn’t I be doing my best to root it out, figure out its cause and fix it?

So, I dove to my knees. Most of the time, when I’m in trouble, that’s all I do. I never have the words to say, but I feel really secure doing that. Anyway, I’m on my knees, saying nothing, just being there, and I realize, I’m like Martha. I’m so caught up in doing things, and getting there and trying to come up with a plan and sticking to it, that I forget that I’m not the plan maker. I get so worried and angry when it doesn’t seem like any of my plan are even possible or wondering when they’ll ever happen and why they haven’t happened yet. I let that anger and discontent about my impossible plans, crowd out this love. Sometimes, I hear a song and the passion is just reignited in me and the love burns in my heart for this amazing God who saved me and who loves me more than I can imagine. In these moments I wonder, what else matters except this love. Is there a way I can bottle up that feeling and carry it around, because I find myself forgetting more than I remember.

Nothing ever goes to plan. You can plan on writing or learning a new song and then the power goes out. You can plan on travelling and you don’t get the chance. You can plan on finishing school one year and end up finishing 3 months later. You can plan on meeting an awesome guy at a set time and meet him 4 years later… (You should know I whimpered and cried a little bit when I wrote that last one) J Anyway, my point is, I need to force my mind sometimes to remember, in the light of the love of the God of the universe, whether the power goes out or not doesn’t matter.

Does that mean I don’t worry anymore or get angry when things don’t go my way, NO. All it means is that, I don’t have to live like one who’s alone. There’s a lot in my life I won’t ever figure out, like why my emotions spiral so dang quickly, or why I am where I am and what happened to lead me here or if this picture or fantasy I have in my head is ever going to come true, but the amazing fact is that God our Love, God is With us, He has overcome. (Yeah, that wasn’t a profound thought; it’s just the song playing on my computer right now, Take Heart by Hillsong United, from the album Aftermath)

I should also mention that apart from the “holy biblical” Martha thing God pretty clearly told me for about the millionth time to quit watching so much TV. In fact I kinda think He emphasized that a lot more than the Martha thing. I get so caught up in other people’s drama sometimes, it really messes me up. I just watched whole seasons of Sherri, GCB, Are You There Chelsea, 6 episodes of Revenge, Greys Anatomy, 30 Rock and Downton Abbey.

Earlier this year, He put it on my heart to delete everything, every last comedy, drama, movie on my computer and my external hard disk. These things cost me money and time, buying and downloading so many episodes of everything! I had over 120 GB of stuff on my computer, all had to go.
First of all, I felt so stupid for deleting everything because I had this thought, “What if I didn’t hear Him right?” “What am I gonna watch?”

Lucky for me, this was the time that I fell in love with Worship and I found all these podcasts to listen to that are changing my life by the way. So, God’s plan worked in that respect.

I kinda felt I was getting a handle on it, so I started buying DVD’s again, and there are days when I feel I have the discipline to say, no, I have to switch this off and have my quiet time now. But then days like yesterday happen, and I realize, this stuff can get out of control, for me. It’s just a gateway to all that drama like I said and that leads to a bunch of other stuff, and it’s not working or worth it for me.
I should finally just accept it and be more disciplined about this. Anyway, I’m going back to my TV fast. For the month of May, I’m taking a break from all that.

Source: via Guy on Pinterest

200TH POST!!!

If you know me, you know I like to celebrate every little milestone! So:

who knew this blogging thing would stick? :-)


Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Kenyan Weather

I live in a country where it can be this at 10 a.m

view from my bed at 8 AM this always wakes me up!

and this at 4 p.m

view walking down my street

This is why;
  1. I need to carry practically a whole other outfit in my bag
  2. I've carried my umbrella in my bag rain or shine every single day since I can remember
  3. I can plan on wearing a cute outfit and have to change it 2 hours later
Honestly, it's so dark and I can hear thunder, and I'm still heading to school! #itsGod

Still, it's really beautiful, and I love our weather.


God is my Dad Part 4

So, as always, I’m praying for you.
Scripture References
1.       (Gen 2:25 [NET]) The man and his wife were both naked, but they were not ashamed.
2.       (Gen 3:7 [NET]) Then the eyes of both of them opened, and they knew they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.
3.        (Exodus 13:21 [NET]) Now the LORD was going before them by day in a pillar of cloud to lead them in the way, and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, so that they could travel day or night.
4.       (Exodus 14:21-22 [NET]) Moses stretched out his hand toward the sea, and the LORD drove the sea apart by a strong east wind all that night, and he made the sea into dry land, and the water was divided. So the Israelites went through the middle of the sea on dry ground, the water forming a wall for them on their right and on their left.
5.        (Exodus 16:13-15 [NET]) In the evening the quail came up and covered the camp, and in the morning a layer of dew was all around the camp. When the layer of dew had evaporated, there on the surface of the desert was a thin flaky substance, thin like frost on the earth. When the Israelites saw it, they said to one another, “What is it?” because they did not know what it was. Moses said to them, “It is the bread that the LORD has given you for food.
6.       (Exodus 16:35 [NET]) Now the Israelites ate manna forty years, until they came to a land that was inhabited; they ate manna until they came to the border of the land of Canaan.
7.       (Exodus 17:6 [NET]) I will be standing before you there on the rock in Horeb, and you will strike the rock, and water will come out of it so that the people may drink.” And Moses did so in plain view of the elders of Israel.
8.       (Leviticus 17:8-9 [NET]) “You are to say to them: ‘Any man from the house of Israel or from the foreigners who reside in their midst, who offers a burnt offering or a sacrifice but does not bring it to the entrance of the Meeting Tent to offer it to the LORD – that person will be cut off from his people.
9.       (John 3:16 [NET]) For this is the way God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.
10.   (2Cor 8:9 [NET]) For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that although he was rich, he became poor for your sakes, so that you, by his poverty could become rich.
11.   (Exodus 25:10 and 22 [NET]) “They are to make an ark of acacia wood – its length is to be three feet nine inches, its width two feet three inches, and its height two feet three inches. I will meet with you there, and from above the atonement lid, from between the two cherubim that are over the ark of the testimony; I will speak with you about all that I will command you for the Israelites.
12.   (John 14:26 [NET]) But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you everything, and will cause you to remember everything I said to you.

In case you’re curious, again I use The Word Bible Software NET version. It’s the best tool I have honestly, because it helps me search through the Bible really easily.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Outfit Of The Day

This is what I wore to school tomorrow. It looked kind of crazy and out there for me with all the lace and sequins on the skirt, but I thought to myself, "Jo, if not now, then when???" Plus, my class was at night, it was the end of the day and it looked like it would rain so people will be too busy getting home in the rain than looking at me...

The pink sweater was gifted to me by my mom, I like it, its girly. The boots are my usual, brown boots.


What I've Overcome by Fireflight

I love this song. I've had the "For Those Who Wait" since almost the week it came out last year, but this song really hit home for me just recently when I really heard the words. I love Fireflight, their testimony is at the forefront of their music and they dont hesitate to be known as a "Christian Rock Band" like other bands are and I think because of that, people gravitate towards their music more, at least I do because they're an open book, and their music ROCKS. Dawn Michele has an incredible voice.

Back to the song, the lyirics speak for themselves,

(Songwriters: Justin Cox, Glenn Drennen, Wendy Drennen, Ben Glover, Dawn Richardson, Philip Shorb)

I've got this passion
It's something I can't describe
It's so electric
It's like I've just come alive

I feel this freedom
Now that my past is erased
I feel the healing
I've found the meaning of grace
(I found grace)

If only you could see me yesterday
Who I used to be before the change
You'd see a broken heart
You'd see the battle scars

Funny how words can't explain
How good it feels to finally break the chains
I'm not what I have done
I'm what I've overcome

I know I'll stumble
I know I'll still face defeat
These second chances will define me

So I'm moving forward
I'm standing on my two feet
I've got momentum
I've got someone saving me (got someone saving me)

If only you could see me yesterday
Who I used to be before the change
You'd see a broken heart
You'd see the battle scars

Funny how words can't explain
How good it finally feels to break the chains
I'm not what I have done
I'm what I've overcome

I make mistakes and I might fall
But I won't break
I've got someone saving me

If only you could see me yesterday
Who I used to be before the change
You'd see a broken heart
You'd see the battle scars

Funny how words can't explain
How good it feels to finally break the chains
I'm not what I have done
I'm what I've overcome
I'm what I've overcome
I'm what I've overcome


Feeling Like an Old Maid

Last night I was talking to my mom about how it seems all my friends are getting engaged and having babies and here I am, with this one year pledge of singleness we made at Church in Febrauary, and how even after this one year, I might end up doing a Ministry internship which as I've seen so far, some don't allow dating, and even after the internship, I'll be spending so much time trying to move to a new city and finding a job and actually making something out of the nothing I currently have and might be so busy I don't even have time to date! So, in reality, I'm looking at about 3 years before I can even have the thought of settling down and falling in love.

If you know me, if you've read my blog, you know how freaked out this makes me.
  • In High School, my life plan was to finish High School, move after a year and get married by the time I was 22, have my first kid at 24 and so on.
  • After High School, I got caught up in the expectations to finish college, make a career, get married, which pushed out a lot of MY dreams
  • Right now, I'm trying to catch up to the High School dream, but now it goes like, know God, experience God, move to a new city, learn God, get married, teach God, get cute babies and so on
My mom, is encouraging me and saying everything that a mom is supposed to say, "finish school", "get a job", "don't be in a hurry or else you'll settle for anything that comes along" and I was telling her, yeah I get all that, I don't want to settle, I want to be loved completely and to be in love and I want to be happy, but I also want to be a young, hot wife and a young, hot mom. I want to be settled with someone who has the same dreams and passions as me (read, God) and someone who we can work together, so that we start working now.

She may say all those things, but the fact remains, she got married at 24, like most of my uncles and aunts. My cousin, who we used to live with, got married at 24, my sister met her husband at 23, my sister in law married my brother at 25. I'm turning 22, I FEEL LIKE AN OLD MAID!!!

Yeah, I know, I'm supposed to be "the one" before I find "the one" and that's what this year's pledge is for and there's stuff I'm building on my own, even with the Ministry stuff. Just to be clear, honestly, this has been an amazing year so far and I wouldn't give it up even if my dream guy walked through the door right now, I've gotten to experience God more in 3 months than I have in 21 years. But I think even God gets that sometimes its easier to work with somebody and to have somebody.

At the end of the conversation with my mom though, an amazing thing happened. I just got this amazing reassurance from Jesus, a.k.a, my awesome, awesome friend, that I don't need to freak about this. He's got my back. Everything's going to be OK, and that filled my heart so much I ended up tweeting this;

I honestly just love Jesus. He's awesome.

Anyway, later last night I was listening to a podcast from Gateway Church, Austin and John Burke just talks about how when Jesus met people who needed something, like the blind men who cried out to Him, He asked them an obvious question, "What do you want?" I mean, duh, they wanna not be blind anymore, they wanna be healed. But Jesus asks a question that we sometimes are too afraid to ask God, because we feel like it's beneath God to hear us, or its too selfish to pray when there's so many other things to pray for, but Jesus asks this question so many times, there's gotta be something to it.

So, I laid it all out there, all my desires, all the crazy things that I hope for, that I see when I picture my future, all the stuff that makes my heart race, like praying or talking or singing or like getting to minister with someone, or watching him minister. Small things like finally having someone put time and thought into my birthday or valentines day (remember I've never had a boyfriend on valentines day :-/ ) And more than any of that, just getting to put into action, or just experiencing love, the kind of love that He's teaching me. I prayed about finishing school in time. I prayed about getting an opportunity to move and find a job and a house smoothly and hassle free.

Like I said, I laid out all the crazy things that look too big and too impossible to ever happen. I'd rather ask and not get than live wondering "What if?" "Why didn't I?" I prayed that if it came down to it, I'm always going to choose Him. It usually takes me a while, but at the end of it, I always choose Him, and with what He's done and how He's changed me so far, it'll probably not take as long a while for me to choose Him. But, I cant help what I feel, and what my desires are, you know?

I always say, God is my dad. He's got my back. Even when it comes to stuff like this.


Glorious by Bryan and Katie Torwalt - Jesus Culture Music

I've been singing this song practically everyday since I've heard it. I LOVE it! I love Bryan and Katie Torwalt's music, they are new artists on the Jesus Culture label and just released their first album together called Here on Earth. First of all, they are just too cute together! Second, their music is kinda folk rock, like a Mumford and Sons which I love. Third, its all worship music.



God is my Dad Part 3

All we’ve gotta do is ask for it. I won’t even tell you the prayer to recite. We’ve heard those words so many times, and like me, maybe you’ve prayed those words a bunch of times but you keep ending up at the same place. It’s not about what words you say. Some of us are angry with God. Fine be angry, tell Him you’re angry and challenge Him for your joy back. Some of us are doubtful of whether He’s even there, fine, be doubtful and ask Him to prove you wrong. I promise you God shows up. For me, He’s shown up in my tears and in my anger, like when I lost my dad or when I have to live in the pain of my regrets. He’s shown up in my laughter and my happiness like when I’m singing or learning guitar or writing up a song. He’ shown up in my doubts and fears about my future in school or the future of my family or the future of my life and this ministry. He’s shown up in my self-disappointment and my low self-esteem and the moments I think I’m not good enough. He’s shown up in my writer’s block and disappointment over how nobody is visiting my blog hehehe and He gives me words to write, songs to sing, music to listen to and His words to remember, the knowledge that I am His child. Wow, God is my dad. God! How dare those negative thoughts come into my mind?! God is my dad! God’s shown up for me. Wow, He has and He will show up for you too.

Honestly, funny enough, I started this post, intending to write about my speculation about whether or not God spoke to me about listening to that song. Maybe He did, maybe He didn’t. I’m sure though, that He’s speaking right now, because I am a good writer but I’m not that good, and the stuff about Leviticus, I didn’t even understand that, and I kind of skim (skip) through the Old Testament when I’m reading my One Year Bible. Point is, God is speaking to you right now, just like He’s speaking to me. Those words are for you. He made sure you’d end up on this page reading these words. Isn’t that amazing? I don’t know you, but I love you, and I care about this so much, that you get to experience this love, and know for sure, for yourself that Church and Christianity isn’t irrelevant or inapplicable to your life, because it’s not about that label or about who else wears that label and whether or not they failed or succeeded. It’s about you and God and His love for you.

Monday, April 23, 2012

You Have Won Me by Brian Johnson - Bethel Music The Loft Sessions

Haha, I promise you you will so clap and dance at the end. Another great song from The Loft Sessions album by Bethel Music.

It kinda reminds me of the Kiswahili song Umeniweza we sing in church because both talk about that crazy happy moment you find yourself in when you realize, man, God's been chasing after us, and its time we were just like, "Oh you've won me, Umeniweza!"

Another absolutely fun song by Bethel Music, can you imagine what Worship is like in that church??? Seriously, Bucket List Item!!!


How To Let Go

Saturday, I went to class; remember how I ducked my Tuesday and Thursday classes, well Saturday I went and my teacher says to me in front of the whole class, "Joanne, you're back?" I hate being pointed out like that, but now that I write that out, maybe it wasn't that much of a big deal...

After class, I decided to go to our Saturday night service so I could chill on Sunday. It was amazing.

We finished up this month's series, "Unshackled" and a couple of things I learnt from that were;

  1. Pride is the "Why should I?!" attitude. "Why is he offended?!" "Why should I apologize?!" 
  2. Pride is easier to swallow than consequence
  3. Pride when swallowed adds no calories
  4. Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting, and we get caught up in the not being able to forget part that we give up on trying to forgive at all
  5. Forgiveness is saying, I let you go, I let it go, God lead me on this road to healing

After the sermon, we pinned up these little notes on which we'd written the names of the people who hurt us/who we hurt on a huge wooden cross they'd set up. That was so powerful. I was just looking at that cross thinking, "Wow, Jesus, because of you, because of this sacrifice you made, because of your blood, I can live in freedom. I don't have to carry the regret and hurt and anger, I can be free"

I wrote down my name and the ex's. I've just spent so much time and energy hating someone, and it's been holding me back for way too long. After last week's sermon, Pastor S encouraged us, to deal with the anger and confront those emotions and he suggested writing a letter, or meeting with the other person, or going through counseling.

I did and it turned out to be like 8 pages long. I was in the worst relationship in recorded history for 8 months so I guess 1 page per month :-) Anyway, I didn't feel like it was necessary and I didn't really feel God pushing me to talking to him or sending the letter. That would just cause a whole other session of me being hopeful for an apology, which at this point wouldn't really mean that much. Also, I don't really think he's ever going to be at that point where he gets it. But it felt incredible for me to just release all that, and then the cross thing just cemented everything together. Now every time bitterness pops up, I remember that note I left on the cross.

So, how to LET GO:
  1. I would totally encourage someone to write or purge themselves like that. I honestly feel so free form that.
  2. Pray about it, yell at God, cry out to God, do whatever it takes to fight for your heart
  3. Release yourself to God's love. That's where it all begins. His love heals, restores, renews. I got this picture in my mind of being in worship, and God's holding my heart and it's got all these black lines running through it, scars and patches from when it's been broken, and God's working on it. It's not instant, but He's not only putting that heart together (that won't lead to an abundant life) He's making it like new (reNEW)
  4. Forgive. Make a choice to let that person or that situation go. Every time a thought pops up, forgive.
  5. Do a small physical act of letting go. This can be like, wearing a certain piece of jewelry, sticking your note up on a cross like me :-) giving away old clothes to charity, burning an old letter, anything that you can look back on and it serves as a reminder of God's sacrifice so you can be free. (Please don't do anything crazy or against the law here :-) )


Sunday, April 22, 2012

God is my Dad Part 2

We go on with our stubbornness though, like we always do. How many times have we had a close call with something, but the next day we do the same exact thing that landed us in trouble again. That’s how it was with God.

God realizes, soon there won’t be enough goats and sheep and doves left because His stubborn people would have sacrificed all of them to atone for their constant sin. There wouldn’t be any people left because the punishment for most of our sin is death, and we would have destroyed ourselves. So God tries again, this time making the ultimate sacrifice. He ripped out a part of Himself. A part of Himself. To be slaughtered in the place of the cows and the goats, and most importantly to stand in our place for us. Jesus, God the Son. 9 and 10

Amazingly, all the rules are suddenly gone. Living by a handbook, it’s all gone. Budgeting for doves and sheep and goats for atonement is gone. What’s in its place? It’s love, constant, unending, unrelenting love. Not only that, because Jesus understands that we are weak and damaged and there’s no way our stubbornness would let us choose to stand up for him or choose to live right or choose to stop doing the things we love doing, so he sends down another part of Himself, the Holy Spirit as a constant line to Him. Think of it as a battery charger and we’re constantly connected to the source. 12

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Happy Birthday BFF!

My best friend in the world just turned 23 and in celebration of her big day, thouught I'd post some pictures of the party I threw her for her 20th birthday!

It was absolutely the best night ever, I threw an awesome party :-) I invited our friend from High School, seriously, we three were inseparable, and I thought it'd be a good idea to have a blowout reunion like we used to dream about stuck in boarding school. There was a lot of dancing, as you can see, and just a whole lot of craziness! I'll do you a favor and not include the pole-dancing pics HA! J/K

I love you sweety!


 The three musketeers, BFF in the middle

 Dancing Kidalipo, you'd have to be East African to understand that :-)

 Lots of laughter :-D

 More dancing

 Lets just call that an Orange juice ;-)

 More orange juice :-)

I dont usually do night outs and this was actually my last one, wow, 3 years ago. I'm not really the going out clubbing type, but this was really good. A chill night with just friends.


Friday, April 20, 2012

My Dear by Hunter Thompson - Bethel Music Loft Sessions

Seriously one of the best songs ever and I know I always say that. Seriously though this is the song that will make you smile when you don't feel like it. Heard it this week when I was struggling with what to do to build up my ministry and so especially if your caught up in work, this will remind you that God's love isn't all work and no play.

At the very least you'll have tons of fun singing it!

Its off the Bethel Music's "The Loft Sessions" album. Hunter Thompson is one to look out for.

To-Do List

I normally get on the internet and forget everything that I'd set out to do, so let me just out all this down:

1. Catch up on Jesus Culture vlogs and videos
2. Check out Worship Release
3. Buy Downton Abbey season 2 and watch the last episode of season 1
4. Download Jared Anderson videos
5. Download Louie Giglio Podcasts
6. Download Gateway Austin podcasts
7. Download iTunes
8. Watch William Matthews videos
9. Watch William Levy on DWTS
10. Check out Worship Central course
11. Check out Casting Crowns videos
12. Upload all my photos to Picasa
13. Catch up on Last Man Standing, Modern Family, Greys Anatomy, Revenge, How I met Your Mother, Big Bang Theory, 

God is my Dad Part 1

I don’t know how I can explain my faith or my belief in God to you. I don’t know if I know enough about Him to say anything. Sometimes to be honest, I have serious doubts about whether He’s really out there or where did He come from, who made God, what comes next? But what I hold on to is that first of all, there has to be something out there, some sort of order to life right? To determine life and death, to create everything. Second, the Bible is the most historically credible book. So, if I believe He exists and I believe in His word, then I’ve gotta believe he’s real and He’s there. I can’t explain it any better; I hope that gets through to you.

I don’t just believe in Him to get through the day or to make myself feel better or to get to experience cool things. I’ve done all that without Him. But, you and I both know that it’s never enough, that despite how many friends you have or how many places you’ve travelled or how well your life is set up, it’s never enough. That’s because God created us to have a relationship with him. The only time in History, man was ever truly happy was when he and his wife were walking along in Eden communing with God.
Then sin happened and separated us from God. Our mistakes, our failures everything that’s made us separated from Him, that’s what sin is. All through the Bible we see consequences of this sin, death and destruction. 1 and 2

God being just, tried to help people get some discipline for themselves to try and get back to where they were with Him, that’s why you see in Exodus and Leviticus all these rules He set up and some pretty strict consequences for breaking these rules. 8 It’s not because God was mean or He’s some sort of police officer or executioner. We are NOT characters in a video game God is playing looking down on us and waiting to press “DESTROY”.

God was trying to get us to get back to that place of oneness with him. Wow, can you imagine the Israelites, seeing all these wonders, the Red Sea parting and destroying their enemies, being led by a cloud to shield them from the sun during the day and a pillar of fire to warm them at night, food from heaven, and water from a rock. I mean, God was there! 3, 4 and 5 Wow, our loving God was there, and He wanted this oneness to continue, so He set up these rules to keep them in tune with Him. But, they broke the rules, so God tries again. He orders the construction of the Ark of the Covenant, so they could carry the very presence of God wherever they went. 11 Again, they broke the rules. To put it in a way that you’d understand, I mean, at this point, God is like stalking them, saying “please be my friend, please be my friend” but the Israelites, shunning the very presence of God, want to turn to idols and elect a king like they saw their neighbors doing. There was a reason why God kept them circling the same mountain for 40 years, 6 they had 40 years to be prepared, to be SO in tune with God that when they got to their neighbors who worshipped all these other false Gods, they would know for sure that their God was the one true God, but even 40 years didn’t help them.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Hiking at Ngong' Hills

Just found a bunch of pics from last year that I never posted on my Picasa album. This is the weekend my classmates and I went hiking at Ngong' Hills, which I'd posted about here.

 This is my best friend Joe, who I was in class with my first two years and who was also my downstairs neighbor for a year. I wouldn't have made it through KU without Joe!
This is me, just in case you don't know where I am :-)

Joe again, this was such a HOT day, literally! That little bottle of water didn't make it to the foot of the Hill, let alone climbing it!

A bunch of people from the group

Love this!

I wish I'd done this!

Reaaaalllly pretty views!

See all the windmills?

Some of my friends, including Njoro who was in my marketing class before I transferred, another great friend who I wouldnt have made it through my 3rd year, nor gotten the info about transferring without :-)

So Fun!

Imagine 15 people squeezed up the little stairs to the windmill.

Fun! Believe it or not, I didn't arrange this pose

Those HILLS!

God is my Dad-Intro

I guess this is the first sermon I've ever written. Its 10 pages long, it has scripture references and everything. This is the first time, I ever thought, "wow, I can actually do this" It started off as me trying to write down my testimony and it just blew up into this. So, over the next couple of weeks, I hope you like it, and it shows you a little bit more about who God is.

Meh! (Part 2)

I guess the one thing we have is Grace, two things actually, grace and love, but lets talk about grace.

First of all, grace isn't a free-pass card to do whatever you want. The only way to experience grace is to take it as an extension of God's love. If somebody loves on you, you don't throw it back in their face, right?

Jude 1:4 talks about ungodly men who've slipped in among God's people, who use grace as a license for evil. He warns the people that if they follow in those steps, they'll be part of the condemnation that's set for them.

1 Peter 5:10 talks about how the purpose of Grace is to restore, confirm, strengthen and establish.

(1Pet 5:10 [NET])
And, after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace who called you to his eternal glory in Christ will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.

Restoring us as His beloved, confirming our place in His heart, strengthening us so we want fall again, establishing us on higher heights.

But, in order to get these, we need to get Jude 1:5 first, we cant use grace as a free-pass. That's not love and we wont be restored, confirmed, strengthened or established if we keep working our way back. It'll be going round in circles, and most importantly, it's not really giving God any glory.

One thing I learnt this week, is that, "The glory of God is at stake." In how I live my life, walk, talk, dress, act, being a friend, a daughter, a sister, in all these things, the glory of God is at stake. As a Christian, I reflect the glory of God. So far, I've not being doing a really good job. I need to constantly check myself, are the actions I do now going to hurt me tomorrow. Is wasting time at work now, going to give me stress tomorrow as I catch up. Its not just a "Christian" thing, its a life thing.

God doesn't want us wallowing in whatever muck we wallow in as a result of going our own way, He doesn't enjoy our "meh!" days just as much as we don't enjoy them. That's the practical reason grace exists, so our lives can be better.

Restore. Confirm. Strengthen. Establish. 

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Meh! (Part 1)

There are some days when I'm so passionately crazy in love with Jesus. I think about the hope, the glory, hanging out with Him in heaven, the fact that an all-powerful God has my back now. My heart just races and fills up with adoration, and I have to be careful at those times to keep my mind on God, so that if a random thought like "cheeseburgers" comes to my head, my heart doesn't follow and misdirect the love and adoration to "cheeseburgers"

(And, no, I don't normally get random thoughts on cheeseburgers, although now that I think about it, I think its been almost a year since my last cheeseburger!)

These are the days I can be watching TV and God says to  me "Come and sing this song for me" and I'd turn off the TV, turn on my music and sing and it's awesome. These are the days when the power's out and instead of complaining, I end up writing 7 new songs. My FIRE days.

Then there are days like yesterday when I'm just like "meh!" I know God loves me, I know I'm a Christian, but I really don't feel like doing much of anything. These days usually follow an event where I feel God say to me something, like, "Don't miss that class!" and I miss it anyway. He leads me and I go off in another way. These are the days when my flesh takes over, and these days SUCK. Yet I still do go off on my own way!

Then there are the days that follow the "meh!" days, when I wake up empty and down, fighting off my old frienemy depression with everything I've got. I find issues in the things that shouldn't be issues. I find reasons to get down on myself, "my hair looks horrible", "my dreams aren't coming true", "I'm still in trouble with school", "did I really pledge I'm going to stay single the entire year?"

That pledge is the one that gives me the most trouble; especially because chances are its not even going to be a year. I wont deny that pledge has probably been the best thing to happen to me for the last 3 years. This break from the rat race has given me a lot of clarity and closeness with God, which is what it was intended for. However, with the clarity came the call to purpose, with the whole wanting to join Ministry. The call came with the probability of the pledge going even longer than a year, because after I'm done with college, I want to go to Ministry School/Internship and in most internships I've been reading on, they don't allow dating, for good reason.

During these days, I wonder if everything really is going to work out. How do I jump into this thing, trust in God, if I can't even go to class when He tells me to go to class. Sometimes I feel like temptation is always at my door, watching and waiting. Old habits, ex-boyfriends, keggers, raves, my past mocking me...

How do I peg my whole life on God, when I cant trust myself?

Be sure to check  out part 2 tomorrow.

Future Life Friday

I am extremely excited to announce the return of Future Life Fridays! Starting tomorrow, we go back to interviews and research on all those little things that make up the Furaha's Fabulous Future Life or as I like to call it, triple FL!  :-)

See you friday!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Outfit Of The Day

This is me trying out pink lipstick and pink blush...

This is me going full siren red lips!

This was actually a few days ago. My simple/office/innocent-cutie/comfortable look :-) The black vest underneath the white shirt just gave it a little bit more layering slimming effect. I liked it.

Make-up was just Luron Compact and Pink blush. Experimented with pink and red lipstick. The pink is more me and what I went with.